Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani: What difference does it make?

Differences and commonalities in a relationship

In the recently released Hindi movie Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani Bunny (Ranbir Kapoor) and Naina (Deepika Padukone) have very different dreams for their lives. While Bunny wants to explore the world, Naina is perfectly happy with being in one place and living the daily grind with her family. Some time in the second half of the film each is trying to convince the other about their respective preferences. Putting a stop to the competition Bunny says the following line,

"Tu right nahi hai Naina, bus mujhse alag hai."

meaning

"You are not right Naina, just different from me".

I remember towards the end of the very first day that my (then yet to be) husband and I met, he introduced me to a close friend of his. We were happy to tell her how the two of us liked many of the same things. She very sweetly and wisely expounded that while it is good to have similar thinking with your spouse, what is more important is how you handle your differences.

Any relationship brings together two separate entities who have been raised distinctively and have had their fair share of unique experiences leading them to form personal views and beliefs. So it is definite that there would come many a moment when in spite of their deep love the couple will have a conflict of opinions. The issue in contest may be a complicated one or something really small. How does one then avoid squabbles in such a scenario?

I had read in an article that instead of attempting to change the other person, try to alter yourself. Eating the food, watching a movie, and wearing clothes of your spouse's liking every once in a while could help increase the common ground. Ordinarily we all like to get our own way, but it is not so bad to give in either. Furthermore, it is most important to submit happily and not out of anger or with frustration.

For the more big topics, just like Bunny and Naina, one could simply respect the opposing party's contrasting thoughts instead of trying to out do each other.

Trial and error (4): Potato cup frittata

I have to admit that though I have learnt to make quite a few dishes for the daily meals, I have been afraid to go beyond that. This is mainly because while the eating part is quick, cooking generally takes much longer. So when trying something new a build up is created which can be misleading like an expected blockbuster film which turns out to have gone all wrong. There have been quite a few occasions when this is exactly what has happened to me. The fact that I am an emotional cook makes it worse. If my pooris don't rise, chapatis are not soft or biryani is not perfect you will find tears dripping down my face.

The good thing about living in Providence is that unlike Uppsala in Sweden, we can get food home delivered. So there is something to fall back on. Not that being forced to do this will make me feel any better. So with a little trepidation I decided to step out of the snack zone to dinner service. However, as always I chose a recipe that would be easy to deliver and would have an appearance and a taste that I could recognize to know for sure of its success or failure.

For the Christmas lunch one of the dishes that my landlady had made was the frittata. In the first Masterchef USA mystery box challenge the contestants were asked to cook something stunning using an egg. A frittata made it to the top three. As I searched over the internet I found that this is really an Italian omelette which makes use of all kinds of filling ingredients like potatoes, spinach, broccoli, zuchini, bacon and ham but obviously not all at the same time. It may be cooked on the stove or in the oven. You can serve it as a breakfast, lunch or dinner along with a salad.

How I did it?
I was all set to make a traditional frittata (like a big pizza circle) on Saturday night when I found a different way of cooking it inside small potato cups as shown by Averagebetty (click to see recipe). I used sautéed onions and green capsicum with coriander leaves but avoided the dressing up with the baby tomatoes. I also refrained from adding cumin powder and fresh cream.

        Finally I served the frittats with a classic salad in drizzled with vinegar and a cheesy pasta. The latter was bought from the market as I was not sure if the frittatas on their own would be filling for tummies used to heavy Indian dinners.

Notes on cooking technique.
Though I drained the potato shreds of water I found that still some remained at the end. I am not sure if this caused any adverse affect. I spread them around the muffin cups with fingers more easily than a spoon. I perhaps used more shreds than were necessary as the base seemed to remain soft.

         The video showed a green chilli paste being added to the egg mix. I used two chillies to make a paste but as it did not become as fine as I wanted, I added some water to get the chilliness into it. I then drained off the chilli bits and used the water to spice up the egg mix.

          When filling the potato cups with the egg mix it looked like there were too many veggies and little of the egg itself. But on baking the frittatas rose and the combination came out right. For removing the frittatas I slid a knife around in a circle. But because the muffin tray was not non-stick some of the potato shreds on the base did not come out. At the same time it wasn't much of a struggle or cause for frustration.

My husband's verdict.
He was very happy with the end result so much so that he made me give some to the other two residents of our building, one of them being our landlady who was the inspiration behind trying the frittata recipe in the first place.

Here is the photo of the dinner plate. Enjoy!

Potato cup frittatas for dinner

A capable woman

(Images taken from http://www.flickr.com/photos/85934826@N00 and http://www.flickr.com/photos/kittykaht)

It was thirteen years ago that we lost Mummy. As I write these lines I am amazed that such a long time has gone by. Yet the memories of her face, the sound of her voice, her demeanour, and everything that she did are as fresh as ever.

Daddy always thought that she truly embodied all the characteristics of a sadgunee stree or a virtuous woman as described in verses 10-30 of Proverbs, Chapter 31. Indeed I don't remember Mummy ever complaining in front of us about all her responsibilities. She was always very giving and loving. She made every effort to make our future better.  Her thoughts were always centred on us and not on her own self. She bore all her illnesses with immense strength, will power and patience. Most of all she had tremendous faith in God.

While growing up time and again Daddy would have us two sisters calculate the number of chapatis (see photos) that Mummy cooked for all of us daily. Assuming a rate of 24 per day the total came to a staggering 87,600 for say a period of 10 years. These statistics always helped us realize the kind of hard work she put in and made us instantly appreciate her.

I have to have to admit that I have especially missed her since getting married. There is so much I could have learnt from her "woman to woman". Not having her around, I take refuge these days in the same words of Proverbs when I feel out of depth or get doubts about what should I be doing. Here they are for you to contemplate on:


10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. 11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. 12 She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life. 13 She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands. 14 She is like the merchants' ships; she bringeth her food from afar. 15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens. 16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard. 17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms. 18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night. 19 She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff. 20 She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy. 21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet. 22 She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple. 23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land. 24 She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant. 25 Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come. 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness. 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. 28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. 29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all. 30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.

Trial and error (3): Crispy rice balls

Quite a few months back we had bought some rice flour to make idiyappams at home. In simple words these are steamed rice noodles. When in Chennai we normally have them with chicken kurma which has a coconut gravy as a base. Unfortunately in our maiden attempt both the batter and the instrument for pressing out the noodles gave us trouble. After this colossal failure the rice flour was relegated to a not easily visible corner.

Now that I am back on my cooking track, I thought of looking for recipes that put to use rice flour and Crispy rice balls came to my rescue.

How I did it?
I simply followed Tarla Dalal's directions given on the link. I used 1/2 cup water for about 2 cups of rice. I did not double the quantity of rice flour from 1/2 to 1 cup as it was a bit coarse in texture. I added about 1/2 tsp of chilli powder though it wasn't mentioned in the recipe.

Notes on the cooking technique.
As I read the method for making the rice balls I realized that my mother used to make something similar except it was with only onions, using soaked bread slices instead of rice flour, making cylindrical shapes and not balls and shallow frying versus deep frying. But as the whole point was to use rice flour I decided to follow Tarla Dalal.

       From my end I kneaded the mixture well so that the rice grains were no longer separate but got meshed. I found that deep frying allowed the rice balls to be evenly browned from all around. According to a reviewer of the recipe it is the rice flour which gives the crispiness.

My husband's verdict.
To my great relief he liked them. It tickled me when my husband thought that they were made from potatoes. What delighted me more was when he was willing to have them again with tea.

Here is the photo of the Crispy rice balls. 

Crispy rice balls made at home

Heavy laden

(Image adapted from: http://www.flickr.com/photos/carsten_tb/)

Reading the news of the young 25 year old Indian actress Jiah Khan committing suicide shocked me. As the details came out, it was revealed that she was going through a difficult time in her professional as well as personal life. Some reports claim that she was unhappy, frustrated and depressed leading Jiah Khan to take this extreme step. Her sister on the other hand says it was a decision made on the spur of the moment. Whatever the real reason may be, a soul has been lost.

The fact is that life is not easy. You may make a hundredfold plans only to find them crumbling. The path that once looked straight could suddenly diverge. The bright morning that was seemingly beautiful happens to turn cloudy and dull by afternoon.

It is important to realize that everybody goes through periods of struggle. For some the hardships can stretch for a longer duration than expected. The disappointments can be heartbreaking and the insensitive remarks you hear from those around you blood curdling. Indeed it might seem too much to bear.

To those who are heavy laden and finding it impossible to carry on, might I suggest that you take a moment and remember the persecution Jesus Christ faced and His crucifixion (Mathew Chapter 27, Mark Chapter 15, or Luke Chapter 23). How agonizing must have been the insults hurled at Him, the blows that He received, the scourging of His body by the soldiers, the crown of thorns that was forcefully fitted on His head, and the final nailing on to the cross. Even more so, how burdened He must have felt under the weight of the collective sins of the world. In comparison aren't your problems small and pain much less? 

It may appear that God is not answering your prayers. But once you start listing you will realize that though He might not be giving you all that your heart desires, He surely is providing you with all you need. So be patient and let not your faith waver. When distressed, just as Jesus Christ did in Luke Chapter 22, ask the Lord:

42 Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; 
yet not my will, but yours be done."

Trial and error (2): Broccoli cutlets

I started the year with the aim of learning a new dish every month (see post). But one early February morning I cut my finger with a knife quite badly and ended up getting a couple of stitches. So that kept me out of the kitchen for a while. Then since my recovery my husband and I have been having friends over at home for lunches or dinners rather frequently. As a result I never went beyond my first attempt. However, watching the new season of Master Chef USA got me excited enough to look at recipes.

For me one of the most daunting tasks is to find some nice thing to munch with our evening tea. All you find in the food stores in Providence are cookies, potato chips and under salted nuts. The shop where we get all the Indian goodies is really far from home and so we go there once a month. The chivdas that we buy however, get consumed within a week to a fortnight. Then there are times when one is in a mood for hot stuff and I end up making onion bhajjis or pakoras. Looking for another alternative I came across the recipe of Broccoli fritters cutlets.

How I did it?
Yesterday evening I tried the one outlined by  Mehan's Kitchen. You can find from the link that cooking them requires very few ingredients and the process is also really easy. Like the author I used besan or chick pea flour, but instead of cheddar cheese I added mozzarella cheese.

Notes on cooking technique.
I found that the final mixture was not dry and somewhat wet. So I used a tablespoon to spread the batter directly on the hot pan as making the cutlets beforehand would have been messy. The good part is the cheese did not melt and spill out.

My husband's verdict.
He thought that the Broccoli cutlets came out well. They were crispy from the outside and soft from the inside.

In all Broccoli cutlets can be considered as a good tea time snack which do not require much cooking time or effort. Hope the photo below entices you to give them a try:

Snacking on Broccoli cutlets