Forgive and forget

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For most part I find hearing and reading Aamir Khan's interviews a treat. In my opinion he comes across as someone whose actions are grounded in thought and do not have a hidden agenda. Many celebrities, mostly from the Hindi film world, have on the Koffee with Karan show said a lot of scandalous things on the pretext of jest. So I wondered how Aamir Khan would fare in comparison.

After watching today's episode if there was one thing that I took away from it, it was a statement the actor made very early on. He said that he is learning to be more forgiving. I was once again bowled over as in today's tit-for-tat world how many of us give any importance to the need to forgive.

For long if I got off on the wrong foot with somebody my immediate reaction was to close my heart to them. I have at times deliberately kept a distance from certain people based on past experiences, unwilling to give them a second chance. In my anger I have turned off the line of communication with a few. But in the last year or so I have come to realize that this is not how it should be.

One of the first prayers that I was asked to learn as a kid was what is called the Lord's prayer in the Bible. Among many things it asks God to,

"Forgive us our as sins as we forgive those who sin against us."

We must realise that however good we might think ourselves to be, we are nowhere spotless and clean. What right then we have to condemn somebody else? If God can forgive so many of our daily wrongdoings then should we not extend the same magnanimity to others? The above short and simple verse tells us that to receive God's grace we must ourselves be full of mercy and kindness.

It is of course possible that even after forgiving a person once, he/she might be responsible for causing you hurt again. Jesus Christ said not seven times, but seventy times seven we should forgive a brother who has grieved us. This is the kind of loving heart we must all have.

Finally I believe that forgiveness is incomplete if you do not let it go. Bringing up past mistakes in your mind only sprouts doubt against the person in question and you are likely to look at his/her actions and words with suspicion. So take out that notebook of records you are keeping and tear it apart and believe me you will feel much lighter, happier and peaceful than when you held all those grudges.